It will always get better. A wound that goes unacknowledged and unwept is a wound that cannot heal. The speech in which he wound up the debate on the second reading was one of the finest, if not indeed the very finest, which he ever delivered. Due to the way the algorithm works, the thesaurus gives you mostly related slang words, rather than exact synonyms. Meaning: So obvious it could not be missed. Rather than: Since ditching shoes, I no longer suffer from foot odor. Well, Id smack the fire out of em if they acted that way around me. u/fatandsalt. Scarce as deviled eggs after a church picnic. Meaning: Im being ignored. I bought it for a song and you can sing it yourself. Her presence would have the same calming effect on Dusty, who was the most wound-up man Jule knew. I had asked her not to place the bag on the floor, but somehow it wound up there anyway, and I did not know about it until Monday morning. Me: "Yes it does.". All rights reserved. Roger H in San Diego This phrase comes form the movie "True Grit".. "uglier than a burnt stump" "on her like a pack of dogs on a three legged cat" You own a home that is mobile and 5 cars that arent. Wife: sideways look Im so hungry, every time I swallow my asshole says thank you. whirlwind. Aprilynne Pike, He smiles sadly. "Thin as piss on a plank" Were closer than two roaches on a bacon bit. Which would entail traits such as Competitiveness Type A individuals tend to be very competitive and self-critical. Linda Cunningham Fluharty You look like something the cat dragged in and the kittens didnt want. Were closer than two roaches on a bacon bit. 50+ Examples of Cliches: Meaning and Origin. Flow tighter than a d..k in the butt. Wound up tighter than an 8 day clock t-shirts, stickers and gifts Wound up tighter than an 8 da Bumper Sticker $5.00: Wound up tighter than an 8 da Light T-Shirt $20.99: Wound up tighter than an 8 da Jr. Ringer T-Shirt $22.99: Wound up tighter than an 8 da White T-Shirt $21.99: This joke may contain profanity. Thatll go over like a pregnant pole-vaulter. "Eyes are shit-color brown." 120 Inspirational Time Quotes To Help You Manage Life. Note: Add a big slice of onion, and stay home for the evening. However, what we do with it varies from one person to another. ", "So skinny they have to stand up twice to make a shadow. As if their kiss bridged the gap between the two worlds, even if only for that one brief, sparkling moment.A sigh that held the weight of years shuddered out of Tamani as their faces drew apart. Holy smokes! After that she appeared on the VH1 show I Love Money and then wound up on Rock of Love Charm School. Busier then a one legged man in an ass kickin contest!!! ~Submitted by keith (leighton,al, USA). suggest new. | Sitemap |. We are afraid the storm will blow us empty. "that dog don't hunt" - bad idea or flawed logic Wife: sideways look She was battin her eyes like a toad in a hailstorm. Busier than a one armed monkey with two peckers. What happened to your arm, Greg? "Harder than a Chicken's lips" "Tightly wound" referring to a Type A personality I'm assuming. Drew another puzzle for the weekend. A friend of mine was kicked out of the army because his wound leaked onto the sergeants uniform. To learn more, see the privacy policy. Holy shmoly! Fact: Mules have denser muscling than horses due to their donkey parent and therefore can carry more and go farther than a horse of the same size. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. My wife was afraid of the dark then she saw me naked and now shes afraid of the light. Rodney Dangerfield. Meaning: Something which ruins or spoils everything else; a nuisance or problem; an unpleasant or disagreeable detail. That smells like the shithouse door of a shrimp boat. "Jumpy as a fart on a griddle" whirlwind." I hope you enjoyed them. Deaf in one ear and cant hear out of the other. Thats about as useful as a trap door on a canoe. Fact: The orange juice company Tropicana created what looks like a sun in the middle of the night in a small Arctic town in Inuvik, Canada. While a good number of folks prefer to "Go piss up a rope." Note: Possums eat just about anything they can catch, or that has expired. Wound tighter than a two dollar watch A very high degree of stress. Hes ridin a gravy train on biscuit wheels. He thinks hes the best thing since sliced bread. To conquer the there's not that remains wound up principals jay asher. Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Drive-in Theater. That truck couldnt pull a spoon out of a cats ASS! That boy was shaking like a dog shittin hammer handles. Darynda Jones On average, everyone has read The Da Vinci Code. HT Chat A look ahead to Mississippi State and the NFL Draft wih news in Oxford, 04 13 23 Jeremiah Jean Baptiste Ole Miss Football Media Availability, 04 13 23 John Saunders Jr Ole Miss Football Media Availability, Hotty Toddy Chat Looking Back at Baseball vs A&M, Tornadoes and City News, Stephanie Hickman to Deliver 2023 Commencement Address, Man Who Made Headlines in 2009 After Police Standoff in Grand Oaks Back in Jail, UM Student Selected to Discuss Science Policy on Capitol Hill, Robotic Device Helps Straighten Bone in Pediatric First for Mississippi, Ole Miss Womens Golf Falls to LSU 3-2 in the SEC Quarterfinals, Seventh Inning Rally Helps Softball Even Series With Mizzou, Ole Miss Baseball Falls In Series Finale at Mississippi State, Ole Miss Baseball Drops Game Two to Mississippi State, FNB Oxford Bank Announces New General Counsel, Senior Vice President Post, Reid Sherman Investors Named to Forbes List of Best in State Advisors for Third Year, Paragon Bank Welcomes Helean Davis as its New Banking Center Manager, UM Theatre and Film Closes Season with Classic Little Shop of Horrors, Theatre Oxford Presents Absurd Person Singular, Registration Is Now Open For UM Summer Programs, Official Merchandiser Announced for 2023 Double Decker Arts Festival. Just A Mom Busy Raising Great Dane Unisex T-Shirt, Womens Funny English Bulldog Mom Unisex T-Shirt, Snoopy Sleep Just Do It Later Unisex T-Shirt, It's Not A Party Until a Weiner Comes Out Unisex T-Shirt, Vintage Best Dog Mom Ever Fist Bump Beagle Mom Unisex T-Shirt, What do you want in life? "as loose as a goose" Hiyo! Youve ever hit a deer with your cardeliberately. u/Rocknocker. "as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs" Note: When you think of an Irish jig, the song The Irish Washerwoman is the tune youre thinking of. Please note that Urban Thesaurus uses third party scripts (such as Google Analytics and advertisements) which use cookies. Because those men are already taken. His knickers are in a knot. Fact: Grasshopper species which change color and behavior at high population densities are called locusts. "Slicker than puppy shit on a wood floor" So deep in jail hell have to be fed beans with a slingshot! A popcorn fart is dry and nonodiferous. Hornier than a two peckered billy goat. (Any other facts or theories regarding the origin will be appreciated! "ugly as sin" Note: Geese have been recorded at 29,000 feet. Shes so ugly when she was a baby her mom fed her with a slingshot, Thats harder than a choir boy in a porn shop. and The search algorithm handles phrases and strings of words quite well, so for example if you want words that are related to lol and rofl you can type in lol rofl and it should give you a pile of related slang terms. Mary Connealy, I loved work and I loved pouring myself into the work, you know. Traveling is like flirting with life. www.lindapages.com, ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*, "Wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one gets filled the fastest. My wife hit me on the head with a bottle of Concentrated Omega-3 capsules this morning. Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit! Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. If you are worried about excessive hair growth on your chest and around the nipples consult a physician to determine the possible cause of your condition and to receive proper treatment. "dumber than a sled rack" Id rather jump barefoot off a 6-foot step ladder into a 5 gallon bucket full of porcupines than. Disney & Theme Parks. Dont let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya. Its hotter than a billygoat with a blowtorch. ", "jumping from the frying pan into the fire", "didnt know whether to shit or go blind", "so drunk he couldn't find his ass with both hands", "never cut a fat hog in the ass with a dull knife", "can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear", "you never miss a slice off a cut loaf" (cut loaf= a non-virginal woman), "It takes a big boy to whip a little man", "took off like a cat hit in the ass with a boot jack", "face as red as a jaybird's ass in pokeberry time", "not tough enough to kick the shit out of your own pants", "smell bad enough to stink a dog off a gut wagon", "so weak you couldn't knock a sick whore off a shit pot", "don't let your mouth run off til your brain's in gear", "you would give a bull dog's ass the heartburn", "didn't know whether to shit or wind his watch", "not worth the scrapings off a hound dogs ass", "hotter than a June bride in a feather bed", "dumber (or crazier) than a shit house rat", "busier than a one-legged man in an ass kickin contest", "hornier than a two (or 3) peckered billy goat", "looks like a crow shit him on a fence post & the sun hatched him out", "don't have one penny to rub against another one", "can't burn both ends of a stick (or candle) at the same time", "tighter than a gnats ass stretched over a rain-barrel", "don't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out" (poor), "Up and down like a whore on Saturday night. The man looks at his wife "For old time's sake?" She nods and they begin to make love. She's a nurse, so I figured she'd dress my wound better than I could. Period. ~Submitted by Nick, It got so quite you could hear a mouse pee on cotton. 1. Oxford Film Festival Announces Matthew Graves Tribute Night, Temps Expected to Warm Up Early This Week; Cold Front to Bring Cooler Temps, Showers Later in Week. Fact: Bread has been used since the 17th century to clean the frescoes on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, Wonder Bread proved to be an especially effective sponge in the restoration of Michelangelos masterpiece. He was drunker than Cooter Brown on the 4th of july. Nuttier than a port-a-potty at a peanut festival. "took off like a cat hit in the ass with a boot jack" Me: "You know who sings that, right?" She was talking fast at the end. 189 matching entries found. "never cut a fat hog in the ass with a dull knife" "sat there like a bump on a log" as car is about to be lowered from the lift, priest ask his mechanic. That boys two bricks shy of a full load. Thats so hard to do itd be like trying to put butter up a wildcats ass with a hot poker! Fact: Scientists exploring a cave in South Africa report evidence of shellfish dinners enjoyed by humans who lived 164,000 years ago. So tight that if you ask him where his toilet is he'll tell you 2nd bottle on the left. A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. Michel de Montaigne. ~submitted by Evan Sordillo (America), he is so stupid he couldnt pour piss out of a boot with the instructions written on the heel. definitions. "Colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra" Note: The phrase first appears in English in the Geneva Bible, 1560, in Job 19:20, which provides a literal translation of the original Hebrew: I haue escaped with the skinne of my tethe. (sic). As you've probably noticed, the slang synonyms for "term" are listed above. wound down cut out dead-ended quitted knocked off gave over broke down packed (up or in) refrained (from) suspended stalled conked (out) winded down stayed paused desisted (from) laid off (of) abated petered (out) Antonyms & Near Antonyms hung on continued persisted prolonged extended protracted drew out Thesaurus Entries Near wound up wounds "as busy as a one-armed barber with the hives" Slower than a herd of turtles stampedin' through peanut butter. ~Submitted by Jackson (Louisianna), The ice is slicker than Vaseline on a porn star. "you never miss a slice off a cut loaf" (cut loaf= a non-virginal woman) Im just hanging out like a hair in a biscuit. "useless as tits on a boar hog" You come home from the garbage dump with more than you went with. He was so fat it was easier to go over top of him than around him. Sign up for our weekly newsletters and get: By signing in, you agree to our Terms and Conditions | Privacy Policy She chose "Tailor Made" and the two wound up engaged. You read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen. ", "A horse that shits fast don't shit long. As the French poet Grard de Nerval said, "The first man who compared a woman to a rose was a poet, the second, an imbecile.". Why anyone would waste whiskey on a cat is beyond me. UM Alum On The Bachelorette: Team Wells or Team Nick? "Kartik," I cry, kissing his cheeks. "Now I know my destiny. Wound tighter than a three-day clock. Nicki Minaj Inauguration Security was tighter than Kirstie Alley in a pair of spandex pants. tightly wound chronically tense, unable to relax, highly reactive My cat is so tightly wound he springs up off the floor if anything startles him, and he startles at the drop of a feather. . It'll take your mind off of it. If i had swing like that i would ride it every night. I came up with a fresh bowl of peas, and the little girl inched away nervously (stranger danger, and all). Holy cow! Sophie dabbed at his oozing wound. "mouth as dry as popcorn fart" "don't have one penny to rub against another one" A wound of the heart is different from a flesh wound. So tight that he got a fiver out his pocket and the queen squinted in the light. You think a chain saw is a musical instrument. "So tight he'd skin a fart" and "The last time he spent a fiver he had to sign the back of it". Custom and user added quotes with pictures. You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are Gentlemen, start your engines.. Rather than: So scared, the heads in the fridge begin to chant. Fact: The accidental invention of corn flakes goes back to 1894 when a group of Seventhday Adventists developed a new food to adhere to their vegetarian diet. milk dud. That makes no sense. Note: The g sounds are nearly as funny as k sounds. The taillight covers of your car are made of red tape. 1. Tim Heaton is an Ole Miss Alumnus from Southaven, Mississippi who supports The Flagship in a variety of public relations efforts. Ernest Hemingway 9 Likes Kissing quotes The sorrow for the dead is the only sorrow from which we refuse to be divorced. November 14, 2015. youre my favorite turd, I wouldnt shit ya. The life of a nurse.hahahahaha!!!! "That (plan, idea, action, etc) amounts to about as much as a fart in a When the deposit is exhausted the company must be wound up or its operations transferred to some other locality. Its like saying, I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station. Lisa St. Aubin de Tern. "scared shitless" Fact: Blackberry tea was a cure for dysentery during the Civil War; during outbreaks, temporary truces were declared to allow soldiers to go blackberrying.. Aint no point in beatin a dead horsecourse, cant hurt none either. She has more chins than a Chinese phone book. I wish I had appreciated my youth - I should have worn tighter clothing when I could have! Wife: "This might sting a little bit." "dumber (or crazier) than a shit house rat" Redneck Laughter:very funny you might be a redneck one liners. "Her ass is as big as the broad side of the barn." Every other wound we seek to heal - every other affliction to forget: but this wound we consider it a duty to keep open - this affliction we cherish and brood over in solitude. "harder than a whore's heart" Im prouder of that than a pup with his first flea. Note: Ducks dont have knees, instead they have a joint in which would more accurately be compared to our ankles. She was so tall she could hunt geese with a rake. report. I took a shot but only caused a fletch wound. He is a contributing writer to HottyToddy.com and actively volunteers his technical, database and social media expertise to several community service organizations in his current home in Morristown, New Jersey and in his home state of Mississippi. It was the real life that I had trouble with." Special thanks to the contributors of the open-source code that was used in this project: @krisk, @HubSpot, and @mongodb. ", "as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs", "so ugly you have to hang a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her", "as busy as a one-armed barber with the hives", "not worth a patch on his (another person's) ass", "cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey", "Runnin' around like a chicken with its head cut off. That looks like two pigs fightn over a If you have any favorite redneck sayings or you might be a redneck sayings you would like to share with us, I would love to see them. ", "Useless as a pocketful of paper assholes. "don't let your mouth run off til your brain's in gear" We're all given 24 hours in a day. Like a picture paints a thousand words, so do the following Southernisms. 7 of them in fact. Zack showed up wearing a light pink shirt that was tighter than usual." - Kyle Adams ", "Slipperier than snot on a glass doorknob", "Raining like an old cow pissing on a flat rock", "Colder than a well-digger's feet in Alaska", "Colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra", "Rattling on (talking) like the clapper on a goose's ass". He has been awarded over a dozen US Patents in technology and is also a published author, chef and physical fitness enthusiast. There were so many people, you couldnt stir em with a stick. 3 comments. ", "Couldn't find his ass with both hands and a coon dog", "Slicker than puppy shit on a wood floor", "on her like a pack of dogs on a three legged cat", "like shit through a goose" - meaning fast, "like green corn through the new maid" - meaning fast, also, "that dog don't hunt" - bad idea or flawed logic, A woman with lipstick - "looks like a jaybird's ass in pokeberry time. Hes so deaf, he cant hear himself fart. Madder than a pack of wild dogs on a three legged cat. Touch device users, explore by touch or with swipe gestures. If Kim Jong Un were assassinated, what would you call his gunshot wound? More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general. Meaning: Common. Note: This phrase is probably nautical from catonine tails, i.e. Whiter than a hound dog's tooth. So here they are enjoy. Giddee up cowboy! Note: The ivorybilled woodpecker is one of the largest woodpeckers in the world. I was thinking of going as a bandaid this Halloween, but then decided against it. ", "Couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel. "Black as a coalie's ass" Looks like Hell with everyone out to lunch. Well shes finer than a frog hair split 8 ways! "lies like an old rug" Five gallons of shit in a 2 gallon bucket. The average coefficient of friction of a banana on linoleum was 0.066. Note: An old recipe goes: roast possum with a brick. See more ideas about nursing memes, wound care nursing, wound care. Follow HottyToddy.com on Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat @hottytoddynews. Me: "Roooooxanne, you don't have to wear that dress tonight, See how similar-sounding words take the place of words that rhyme completely in these examples. "colder than blue hell" To conquer the there's not that remains wound up principals jay Asher. Boy you got about as much sense as god gave a goose. From Detroit. Dogs, cats, small rodents, horses, and primates all lick . The people, whose enthusiasm was now wound up to the highest pitch, again made the air resound with their loudest acclamations. Write the best story you can. ), Linda Cunningham Fluharty You know what they say, Margaret. Note: Jrg Sprave fired a 1inch steel ball with an armbraced slingshot, at a speed of 207 feet per second for a world record. "not worth the scrapings off a hound dogs ass" Here are a few redneck sayings shared with us by our guests. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk. "so drunk he couldn't find his ass with both hands" They have a stew already done, so they just need to mix up biscuits and set the table." Fact: Fleas feed once every day or two, and generally remain on their host during the interim. Note: Imitation Bacon Bits are made from textured vegetable protein (TVP) i.e. "Left high and dry with no pot to piss in." There is no sley used in this, nor is a shuttle necessary; in the room of the latter a stick covered with thread called singa is thrown into the warp as woof, which is beaten in by a piece of plank called beyno, and as the cloth is woven it is wound up to the roller. And why are you eating that giant bowl of herbs? She nods and they begin to make love. Redman Chewing Tobacco sends you a Christmas card. Martelli Minute Wound Tighter Than a Bobbin Label. While crude, vulgar, and possibly offensive to some, I believe they should somehow be memorialized. If you can save 50 percent on a designer dress already, but at the end of the season you can buy your little girl that same dress for another 30 percent off, you've wound up saving more than you thought possible. Once you've managed to slip past the barrier of trying, the next fundamental thing to loosen is your attention. Youve ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog. "Good girl," he said, like she was a well-behaved horse. They lived so far out in the country that the sun set between their house and town. "asshole deep to a ten foot indian" Lists. Why did priests heal wounds before doctors? Slicker than a harpooned hippo on a banana tree. Yesterday someone hit me with a bottle of Omega-3 pills. Thats lower then quail shit in a wagon rut! The man looks at his wife "For old time's sake?" If you have a collection of funny redneck sayings you would like to share you can create your own page offunny redneck sayings or quotes by visiting oursayings and phrases page. Me: Yup. Note: A fritter is a pancake made with corn meal. "It's let me go. 1. Day 3: The terrible wound on my leg from the lion attack has all but stopped bleeding. Shes purtier than a mess of fried catfish. tight as a drum (as) tight as a drum 1. "Crazy as a shithouse mouse" Then Dorothy wound up Tik-tok and he danced a jig to amuse the company, after which the Yellow Hen related some of her adventures with the Nome King in the Land of Ev. Note: Why roosters seem to love to crow anytime, including mornings, isnt fully understood. His back arches, and every muscle in his body tightens. "The cow is out of the barn." "ain't got both oars in the water." You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard. (Any other facts or theories regarding the origin will be appreciated!) Hes about as useful as a pogo stick in quicksand. Directions to your house include Turn off the paved road.. Meaning: The edge of the world, look out youre going to fall off, far. ~Submitted by Angela (Irvine, Ky ), You might be a redneck if your weekly mass is the prayer before the national anthem at the PBR events. Don H. Staheli Got that super soaker pussy pop like cola coka. If his brains were dynamite, he couldnt blow his nose. You have ever bar-b-qued Spam on the grill. She's wound up tighter than the girdle of a Baptist minister's wife at an all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast. Sometimes it's best to watch others perform the joke. bae). They strive toward goals without feeling a sense of joy in their efforts or accomplishments. Like its Facebook page: If You Love Oxford and Ole Miss. What do you say when someone wants to stitch their own wound? "colder than a well digger's ass" I tried to ease her by saying: Her mom chimed in: "I get it." That would be a tall drink of water. I think that boys about two sandwiches shy of a picnic. "lower than a snake in a wagon track" I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but Im not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant. Robert McCloskey. You have a hefty bag where the window of your car should be. That's the beautiful thing, man, we're actually better now than ever, probably more intense now than ever, tighter now than ever. Work is more fun than fun. Noel Coward, Note: From the mid1800. Didnt last long though. Her lips filled with the sweetness of his mouth and Tamani held her against him as if he could somehow pull her inside him, make her part of him.And for a moment, she did feel like a part of him. Redneck sayings are fun, but no list of funny redneck sayings would be complete without the ever famous you might be a redneck if sayings. Note Researchers from Britain and the US have succeeded in growing teeth in a chicken. The tragic aftermath: 9 wounded, 15 decreased. Youre swinging that driver like a washer woman. Whats New 3 12 24 72. George R R Martin Because we are. ", "actin like she's got bees in her bonnet", "actin' like her tits got caught in a wringer", "You look like you have been drug through a knot hole ass backwards. I grew up in the country, on Boggs Run, in Marshall County, West Virginia. Nuttier than a port-a-potty at a peanut festival. Tighter than a skeeter's ass in a nose dive. Rather than: Heavy as a boardinghouse dumpling. He's one of these type A personality guys who's always wound up tighter than a springwears whatever face suits the crowd. "actin' like her tits got caught in a wringer" I'm tighter than face lifts and flyer than spaceships. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. The tighter you try to hold on to a Taurus the more they will slip through your fingers. When autocomplete results are available use up and down arrows to review and enter to select. Even a blind man on a galloping horse could see it. If you were the one to say Ill have to remember that one to use it some day and then forgot, well here is where you can find it. If you dont use your head, you might as well have two asses. He couldnt hit the ground if he fell twice! Why, its so cold herewe got dogs stuck to fire hydrants all over town. She didn't stop or even slow her step. So tight that if you stick a lump of coal up his arse a diamond pops out. Thankyou for visiting this collection of funny redneck sayings and redneck quotes. "The girls can do it. The Urban Thesaurus was created by indexing millions of different slang terms which are defined on sites like Urban Dictionary. Note that due to the nature of the algorithm, some results returned by your query may only be concepts, ideas or words that are related to "term" (perhaps tenuously). . 1 comment. "tough as shoe leather" Jeez Louise! Jackpot! "Thyme heals all wounds". "knee high to a grasshopper" You could start an argument in an empty house. Human condition generally associated with mental stress. Southern Sayings About Bad Character "Those two are closer than bark on a tree.". "up Shit Creek without a paddle" Wound Care Quotes. Hes so stupid, he couldnt find his ass with both hands. Note: There have been incidents of goats having as many as eight horns and that is a lot of worrying.